


Three Wishes for Verstappen

by PoemAboutCitylights



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Christmas, Dan is lonely, Fluff, Halloween, M/M, MAX IS AN IDIOT BUT IN CAPS, Not actually anonymous texting, max is an idiot, some mystical elements i guess?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-18
Updated: 2019-12-27
Packaged: 2021-02-08 13:35:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 20,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21476866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PoemAboutCitylights/pseuds/PoemAboutCitylights
Summary: Max gets an extra sim card to message a girl he met at a party.When he accidentally messages Daniel, of all people, instead, he misses the point to clarify that Dan is not talking to a stranger.***this has elements from the fairy tale "Three Wishes/Nuts/Gifts for Cinderella"
Relationships: Daniel Ricciardo/Max Verstappen, Lewis Hamilton/Nico Rosberg
Comments: 190
Kudos: 522





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into 中文-普通话 國語 available: [维斯塔潘的三个愿望](https://archiveofourown.org/works/22333525) by [Xylophone323](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xylophone323/pseuds/Xylophone323)

> This fic is set during the second half of the 2018 season :)

_Oh, fuck this!_ Max thought and hit the brakes hard before speeding into the corner. Not a real chance against the Mercedes in the end, anyway, but he came third so that could have been a decent day. A good one, actually.  
But it didn’t feel like it, just like few things had been feeling good lately.  
Because Max was – well – fuming.  
Not that he had the right to be, he was aware, but he was angry nonetheless.  
At Red Bull, at Renault, at Dr. Marko and at Daniel.  
He was angry at Red Bull for being so fucked up from time to time, angry at Renault for even daring to make a move, angry at Dr. Marko for what he considered obvious reasons and angry at Daniel for…  
Yes, what was he even angry about?  
Daniel had beaten him more than once, had dominated him almost effortlessly in the beginning of the season, so shouldn’t he be glad to get rid of him as a teammate?  
Wasn’t that what a sane person would be?  
Apparently, he wasn’t sane.  
But that wasn’t exactly new, was it?  
  
Dan had finished fourth, yet another race where he had been close to a podium but hadn’t made it in the end and the wide grin he had put on for the media hadn’t been able to hide away his disappointment. So Max had turned his back on him, had tried his best to avoid the Aussie after the race for reasons he really didn’t want to think about for too long.  
Dan would tell him about his disappointment later on, in all detail.  
Not that he knew he would be telling it to Max.  
Because Max wasn’t sane.  
Max, on the contrary, was clearly fucked in the head.  
But when his phone, not his _real_ phone but _his_ nonetheless, buzzed in the pocket of his jeans a few hours later, Dan’s name lighting up the screen, he ignored the wave of guilt washing over him and started typing.

It had started as an accident, a few weeks ago.  
Max hadn’t planned on it to happen and it had been a pile of unfortunate circumstances adding up to the mess his life was now.

The Dutch had bought an extra sim card for his phone, to get a number that wasn’t associated with him. Carlos had given him the advice, along with a wink.  
“Every man has desires,” Carlos had let him know, wiggling his eyebrows, and Max had brushed him off with heated cheeks.  
But the suggestion kept nudging on his mind, until he had eventually walked into a store to buy one.  
“Sometimes, you meet someone at a bar and want to stay in touch with them, _you know_,” Carlos had explained, shrugging his shoulders, “giving them your real number is far too personal, though. Not to forget risky.”  
Max remembered his best friend’s words when he slid the sim card into the extra slot of his phone, synched his two sim cards in order to get some of the phone numbers he had been given by attractive strangers over the last weeks and hesitated before sending out the first text.  
How could this be a good idea?  
A hook up phone?  
It had been working for Carlos, fair enough, but that was different. Obviously.  
He pushed his concerns to the back of his head and opened his messages.  
There was this girl, Dana, who had slid her phone number into the pocket of his pants while they had been dancing rather closely in a club in Singapore. He hadn’t texted her before because she surely knew who he was and giving her his real number hadn’t felt right. Like Carlos had said, that stuff was _risky_.  
But texting her with his new number? Much less of a risk, surely. He nodded to himself and searched for her number in his contacts.  
How was he supposed to start the conversation?

He eventually settled for a brief “hey gorgeous, I’ve been thinking of you” and almost forgot about the text until his phone suddenly buzzed.  
  
_I may be gorgeous but how’d u know?_

Max grinned at the text.

_Who is ‘you’, anyway? _

Max was about to answer the message, when his gaze flickered up and he nearly gulped, staring at the screen of his phone in disbelief.  
Oh no.  
He hadn’t messaged Dana. Instead, he had apparently sent a suggestive text to his very own teammate.

**Sorry, wrong number. **

Dan sent back one of these laughing/crying emojis and Max started to feel sick.

_Wrong number? U been played? _

Max sighed before answering the text.

**Whatever**.

_Not that much of a talker, are you? _

Dan’s reply came faster than expected and Max sent back the middle finger emoji.

**I don’t think that’s any of your business, you’re just a random guy I accidentally messaged. **

_How do you wanna know I’m a guy? I could be a Victoria’s Secret model for all you know. _

Max rolled his eyes but found himself smirking at his phone.

**Excuse me for assuming you’re not. A model, then. **

_Exactly_.

**Interesting**.

_Yeah, I’ve definitely got the looks for it. _

Max snorted at that message and for a moment considered to send back a particularly unflattering photo of Dan sleeping with saliva drooling on his chin but that would have meant to blow his cover and this was actually quite funny for the moment.

**You stimulate my imagination. **

_That turned sexual pretty fast. _

**That’s not how I meant it. **

_Lol_.

Lol? Daniel had to be about the only person who still used words like “lol” but to be fair, Daniel was a dinosaur so Max probably didn’t have the right to blame him for it.

_Now that we’ve sorted out that I’m a Victoria’s Secret model, what do you do for a living?_

Was now the right time to tell the truth?  
That would mean he’d have to explain the situation to Daniel. The extra sim card included.  
And, mind you, it had been awkward enough to discuss the matter with Carlos, he really didn’t need his older teammate to know about it.  
He’d probably go all “_oh young grasshopper_” on him and that was a clear No from Max’s side.  
And didn’t Daniel have better things to do on a race day’s evening than to talk to a supposed stranger via text?

**I don’t wanna tell.**

Dan’s reply followed almost immediately.

_Intrigued by me being a lingerie model? ;)_

**Of course**

Max’s was surprised when Daniel answered his message with a picture. It showed an empty plate of food, along with the words _I work very hard for my divine body. _

Max raised his brows and started typing with a smirk.

**I can only imagine**

_Yeah, so what u up to atm? _

Ehm. Max looked around the room. He couldn’t tell his teammate that he was currently in a hotel room, re-watching the highlights of the race. Obviously.

**Nothing, just chilling a bit.**

_Nice_

When their conversation died down at that point for several minutes, Max eventually asked:

**What about you? **

_Admiring my fine body ;) _

Oh God. Max felt his cheeks heat up immediately and it felt like his breath was leaving his body. This was clearly heading somewhere, wasn’t it?  
What was Dan doing?  
And then he remembered what Carlos had told him, about how everyone has their _needs_, and Max gulped hard. Surely, they were all lonely in some way, being on the road and away from anything stable for the greater part of the year but sexting with a complete stranger? Dan didn’t even know if he was a guy or a girl, did he?  
Max supposed that the stranger thing was what this all was about in the end, though.  
He had seen Dan’s disappointment after today’s race. He could understand that the Australian was seeking for some kind of distraction.  
But Max was his teammate for God’s sake, which Dan couldn’t possibly know of course, so he’d still have the chance to get out of this easily. By pretending that he didn’t get what Dan was heading for or simply stop answering the Aussie.  
Max couldn’t tell why he didn’t do any of those. Probably because he was really, _really_ fucked in the head.  
Or maybe because that electricity that was rushing through his body, caused by the sensation of doing something he really shouldn’t do and what would probably backfire and make him curse himself into all eternity, felt incredibly close to the adrenaline rush you got before the final lap of a Qualifying. And Max had never been one to say no to the extreme.

So that stupid, stupid decision a few weeks ago was the reason why Max was sure that Dan would text him again this evening, because he had looked just as disappointed after today’s race as he had been that day.  
Over the course of the last weeks, they had been chatting rather regularly and it had turned from mostly joking around and, well, _sexual stuff_, to conversations that were more serious.  
The Australian had really paid attention and hadn’t let anything slip that would have given his dialogue partner a hint on his true identity but when Dan texted things like “_I’m kind of worried of losing my job because all the other models fall off the stage less often_” Max couldn’t help knowing exactly what his teammate was talking about.

**I bet it’s only because they give you shitty shoes to walk in**, Max had answered, wondering if he was being too incautious with that.  
  
_But there’s this girl who has to walk in the exact same shoes. She doesn’t fall off the stage. _

The words were followed by a sad emoji and Max felt something in his chest tightening.  
He couldn’t help thinking of his dad’s advice he had grown up with; don’t look after a teammate. His dad had insisted that a teammate’s struggles weren’t any of Max’s business but with all the things, all Max had done over the last weeks, that certainly couldn’t be true anymore.

**It’s not your fault.**

_That’s very nice of you to say but I think it is. No matter what I do, no matter how hard I try, I still fall of the stage. _

Their conversation stopped at that point for the day because Max couldn’t think of anything to say that wouldn’t reveal too much.


	2. Chapter 2

A week later, they were in Mexico. Qualifying had just taken place and Max was boiling on the inside (and on the outside as well, probably).   
He was watching Daniel from his part of the garage, took in how Dan hugged all his mechanics with the biggest grin on his face.   
He had taken something away from Max that would have guaranteed him a spot in the history books and Max wasn’t so sure if he’d be able to forgive Dan for it.   
In moments like this, it was so easy to follow his father’s lead. Daniel was his opponent. Daniel wasn’t any of his business.   
But when he witnessed how Dan stood still in one corner of the garage, closing his eyes for a few moments, his back turned on the rest of the team, Max wasn’t so sure of that anymore.

_I did it._

**You did what?**

_I didn’t fall off the stage. _

Max stared at his phone, swallowing hard.   
His fingers were shaking when he typed in his answer.

**That is great to hear. I’m proud of you. **

Was he? Was he really?  
How could he be proud of Dan with everything that had happened today?  
Dan probably hadn’t felt proud of him, ever. So why was he now supposed to feel proud of the Australian?   
But if he wasn’t why had he texted it Dan?

The next day, Max almost forgot about Daniel completely, a win making up for yesterday’s loss.   
A podium is a podium, champagne is champagne and he sure knew how to celebrate.   
  


“Congrats.”   
Max nearly jumped when he felt the Australian’s hand on his shoulder, turning around to face the older driver.   
“Thanks,” he managed to mumble and only realized he had been staring at Dan with wide eyes when the Aussie chuckled quietly.   
His teammate wasn’t wearing his racing suit anymore, which only then gave Max the clue that Dan hadn’t been able to finish the race.   
“I’m…” he started and frowned, “I’m sorry for the DNF.”   
Daniel held his gaze for a couple of seconds, something close to curiosity lighting up in his brown eyes, before he averted his glance and shrugged.   
“I’m used to it by now. It’s okay.”  
Max was very aware that it truly _wasn’t_ okay, that Dan was probably screaming on the inside, wanting to tear down the whole Red Bull garage with his own hands.   
His throat felt dry at the thought and Max almost said something really stupid, something comforting, but his dad’s words came to his mind before his stupid mouth would have been able to do so.   
“New chance in Brazil, then!” he mumbled and fled from the situation, cursing himself.

They were sharing a flight from Monaco to the circuit in Brazil as there were two weeks between the two races and as usual, silence had settled between the two of them.   
Max was sitting on the right side of the private jet’s corridor and Dan, wearing headphones, on the other.   
The Australian seemed to be sleeping, as his head had fallen back against the seat, shoulders relaxed.   
Max leaned against the windows and kept on watching.

About half an hour later, Daniel woke up from his nap and stretched his long legs, while Max was busy doing his best not to stare, feeling his neck growing hot.   
As always when he found himself on the edge of having to ask himself what this thing with Daniel was – that thing, that wasn’t even existing in real life – he pushed the thought back as far as possible.   
From the corner of his eye, he witnessed how Dan fetched his mobile phone out of his bag and it was just a few seconds later that Max’s own phone alerted him of a new message.   
  
He had never answered Dan’s text in front of the other driver, too afraid that the Aussie would somehow notice what was going on. Which wasn’t very likely, of course, as Max spent the bigger parts of the day with his phone in his hands, anyway.   
However, he carefully leaned further away from the older one as he unlocked his phone and changed to his extra sim card.

_I don’t think I can do this any longer. _

Max risked a glance at Dan but the older one’s face didn’t let anything slip. He also didn’t seem to notice Max’s stare, as the Aussie was looking down at his own phone in his hands expectantly.   
Carefully, Max began the typing.

**Working as a Victoria’s Secret model? **

Once the message was shown as read, Dan made an amused sound which was followed by a sigh, causing Max’s gaze to snap up again.   
“Anything funny?” he couldn’t stop himself from asking and oh my God, was that a blush on Dan’s cheeks? The spare light made it hard to say for sure.   
“Nah, just some inside joke you wouldn’t get.”   
_An inside joke._   
Max swallowed hard.   
If only Dan knew…  
Yeah, what if he knew?   
Max didn’t want to think about it.

“Okay,” Max said, somewhat perplexed, and Dan shot him a quick smile.   
The Dutch lowered his head and his screen informed him that Dan was typing a reply.

_Yah_.

Max gaze snapped up so fast that he hit his head against the window painfully, raising Dan’s attention.   
_Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck._

“You okay?” Dan asked, looking both amused and a little worried. Max nodded rapidly.   
But was _Dan_ okay? Apparently not.   
He wasn’t serious, was he? He wasn’t actually considering to quit racing… was he?   
“I’ll…” Max said and got up, gesturing at the toilet.   
Dan nodded and chuckled softly.   
With burning cheeks and a beating heart, he made his way down the corridor and locked the door of the small room behind him.   
He sat down on the closed toilet and unlocked his phone, staring down at their chat.

**But I think you’re a great Victoria’s Secret model. **

Dan replied just a few seconds later.

_How’d you know?_

**I just know**

_Well, ur wrong _

**I don’t think I am**

Dan then seemed to be typing for almost a minute, despite the eventual reply being quite short:

_Cute_

It made Max wonder what the Aussie had wanted to say initially but hadn’t send in the end. Before leaving the toilet and going back to his seat, Max sent another message.

**I believe in you. **

Because that’s what he did, didn’t he? He believed in Dan. Because that was what friends did.   
Were they friends?   
He kept thinking about that question when he had sat down, carefully watching Dan who had leaned his head against the wall of the jet, appearing lost in his thoughts while he was staring out of the window.   
They sure appeared like friends. Max was aware that they were the showpiece of friendship in F1 because they got along decently.   
But was it even possible to be friends with a teammate?   
He had to think of Kimi and Seb who definitely were friends but those two were something else. He then thought of Lewis and Nico and everything that the sport had done to their relationship. These two weren’t friends. Maybe something more and definitely much less, but friends? No one in their right mind would claim that.   
So what about him and Daniel?   
He was friends with Carlos, wasn’t he?   
But that had only happened because they weren’t teammates _anymore._

He could not help thinking of his dad.   
He could guess what his father would have to say on the matter.   
  
But despite it all, he wanted to be Daniel’s friend, didn’t he? Wasn’t that what all this was about? Being Daniel a friend, _understanding_ his struggles.   
He banged his head against his seat.   
What a fucked place his head had to be if the only way to be the Aussie’s friend was to anonymously chat with him without the older one’s knowledge.

**Are you actually thinking of quitting your job? **

That had to be inconspicuous enough, Max supposed.

_Nah, it just sucks_

Max felt a wave of relief washing over him and somehow had to think of his dad once again. He got the feeling that his father would decline rather many things about him lately.

“Hey, Dan,” Max eventually made himself say, waiting for the Australian to look at him.   
“Mh?”   
“Are you okay with… with all of this? I mean, I can only imagine how it has to feel but… you know…” Max felt himself blush and coughed, “what I’m trying to say is, if you need someone to talk to about it… I’ve got you?”   
Dan raised his eyebrows but a smile settled on his face.  
Nodding, he said, “Thanks, Max. I appreciate it, mate.”   
“So…” Max felt like digging deeper, despite knowing that he should probably just keep his mouth shut, “do you have people to talk to about it?”   
Dan nodded once again, “Don’t worry, man. I’ve got a person, yeah.”   
“A person?” Max inquired, only then realizing what it sounded like.   
“Don’t worry, Maxy, I’m not dating anyone,” Dan chuckled and the Dutch had a hard time figuring out how sincere it was.   
“Yeah, um, that’s not… that’s not what I meant.”   
Dan looked at him with curiosity, “Okay then. What was it that you meant?”   
“Just… isn’t one person… too few? Like, I…”   
Gosh, he was making a complete fool of himself and had no idea what he was trying to convey, apart from the fact that he apparently was the only person Dan was discussing his struggles with.   
“Nah, it’s fine. It’s a person I like and who is – more importantly – discreet.”   
_Great_, Max thought. So instead of talking through his problems with people who might actually be able to help Daniel, the Aussie was consulting a total stranger.   
Who wasn’t as much a stranger as the older driver believed, but was a stranger in a way nonetheless.   
“Okay, great, then. Just let me know if you need someone to talk to that isn’t that person.”   
Curiosity was now written all over Dan’s face, the question _why should I be talking to you of all people?_ clearly visible.   
“Thank you, Max.”   
_Thank you, Max._   
Which was as good as a _never in a billion years, Max_.   
The fact that Daniel wasn’t willing at all to talk to him about his problems only showed how abusive it was of him to sneak into Dan’s private life without the older one’s knowing, wasn’t it?   
They fell into silence for the rest of the flight and once they had landed in Brazil, Max did his best to avoid his older teammate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't have the time to beta read this but I wanted to upload a new chapter today soooo here it is.   
Thanks for all the nice comments so far and please tell me what you think.   
Kudos would mean a lot :) 
> 
> I hope this story can at least a little bit heal all of our pain coming from the fact that I'll upload the very last chapter of "A Latesummer in Amsterdam" next week.   
HOWEVER, I'm currently already writing a new Maxiel fanfic (not this Three Wishes fanfic) that I will probably start posting next season.   
So there's a lot coming haha


	3. Chapter 3

On Saturday, Max woke up to a couple of new messages.

_Today is another important day for me @ work_

_I’m kinda scared things won’t work out for me_

_Again_

Rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, Max sat up and ran a hair through his hands. He knew that Dan was in the room next to him. It would be so easy to uncover his lies, as he felt worse and worse with every day that was passing by.

**I’ll keep my fingers crossed for u**

**You’ll make it**

_Hell, I’ve become a whiny loser _

**That’s okay, I guess. You must be sore from falling off the stage all the time**

_Lol_

**Not to sound too smart, but have you considered wearing lower heels?**

It was a difficult task but maybe he’d be able to cheer Dan up just a little?

_Yeah, new shoes for next year_

Max bit down on the inside of his cheek. Of course.

**Sounds great**

After sending the text, he wondered if he maybe should have sent an emoji along with it to not sound too sarcastic.   
Had he been sarcastic?

_So what about your day? Anything planned?_

_Hah_, Max thought.

**No, just chilling with some friends, **was what he sent**. **

_Have fun!_

**Thanks**

_You know, I kinda wish we could hang out some time ..? _

Without putting much of a thought into it, Max asked “**We**?”. It took Daniel some time to reply this time.

_Don’t fancy hanging out w/ a Victoria’s Secret model? _

The Dutch felt the skin of his face growing hot while not being able to think of a clever reply. Of course he wanted to hang out with Dan. That was kind of the whole point why he was still keeping this construct of lying up.   
But _he_, as _Max_, wanted to be the Australian’s friend. Dan was seeking the friendship of a stranger.

**No, it’d be cool **

J was Dan’s reply.

_I know we’ve tried to keep this as anonymous as possible but may I ask where you’re living? _

Max stared down at his phone while his face now felt as if it was on fire. What was he supposed to say?   
In the end he remembered something he had once heard: a good liar sticks as close to the truth as possible.

**I’m from Monte Carlo.**

Holding his breath, he was waiting for Daniel’s answer. That couldn’t possible make him suspicious, could it? After all, Dan had no reason to assume that his conversation partner wasn’t a stranger who had accidentally texted him. He’d write it off as a coincidence, wouldn’t he?

_I have relatives in Monaco! Staying with them a few times a year!_

Max let out sigh of relief and had to smirk down at his phone. So Dan wasn’t too serious about the truth either.

_I’ll message you_

**Okay**

Max tugged his phone away and got up to get ready for the day. Whenever he crossed paths with Daniel before the Quali, he turned his back on the Aussie.

In the end, it was incredibly close between the two of them, Max taking the lead over his teammate eventually. Not that it really mattered anyway, since Dan would start from further back due to his turbocharger.   
It was when they had all stopped their cars, Max and the Australian back on their ways to the garages, when Dan’s gaze interlocked with the Dutchman’s.   
Where disappointment had once been, Max was now greeted by no emotions at all. Dan’s eyes were blank, empty and bare of any feelings.

Max felt how his chest tightened instantly, how he gritted his teeth and stared at the Australian, their eyes still meeting, connected from one end of the garage to the other.   
Daniel was suffering, it was as obvious in that moment as it had never been before.   
Where before had been anger, frustration, disbelief and disappointment was now nothing at all. Dan had accepted his fate, had accepted what this car was doing to him and obviously did not believe in progress anymore at all.   
  
“Dan!” Max shouted after the Aussie who made his way straight to his motorhome, “Dan, wait a sec!”   
The older one didn’t even bother to turn around, instead he simply stopped and waited until Max had caught up with him.   
The younger one went around the Aussie until he could see his face, a little out of breath.   
“Are you okay?” he asked and tried to breathe calmly, not letting too much of his worry show.   
Daniel scoffed but it was a half-hearted sound without any kind cutting edge.   
“Sorry,” Max said and shook his head.   
_Of course_ he knew he was falling for the Australian, _of course_ he was aware that Dan was more than a teammate for him by now.   
And yet, it was still such a painful realization when he stood in front of the older one in a corridor leading to their motorhomes, Dan’s racing suit resting low on his hips, his face worn out and tired. Max hadn’t thought this would happen and it had happened still, the racing heart thrumming against his rib cage enough of a proof.   
And Daniel, on the other hand, was so painfully, _painfully_ unaware of everything that it nearly knocked all oxygen out of Max’s lungs.   
The way that Daniel then raised an eyebrow, too polite to straight out say he didn’t feel like talking to Max right now, made that clear just another time.   
“You wanna come over later? Grab a beer or something?”   
There it was again, that sort of surprise on Daniel’s face, which Max interpreted as _why would I do that_?   
“Beer?” Dan repeated, somewhat perplexed.   
“Well, non-alcoholic of course but I’ve got a Playstation in my hotel room…?”   
Daniel’s eyes lit up, “So you need someone to kick your ass at FIFA?”   
Max nodded, a small smile starting to spread on his lips.   
“Is that a yes?”   
“I reckon it is,” the older driver shrugged his shoulders and the corners of his mouth started twitching.   
“Cool, see you later then,” Max said and went back into the garage, feeling Dan’s gaze on his back.

It was ridiculous, really, how Max was pacing through his hotel room waiting for Daniel.   
It was a relatively small room, the TV on the wall opposite his bed, which they would have sit on to play FIFA.   
Max had even made the bed, straightening the sheets, and he couldn’t remember any time he had ever done that when expecting a guest.   
When the silence of his room was suddenly interrupted, it took Max a second to figure out where the noise was coming from.   
He then identified it as a message alert und grabbed his phone from a sideboard, noticing that Dan had texted his extra sim.

_U there?  
I guess I need some advice_

Advice?   
But when Max wanted to text back, another sound disrupted the silence and this time it was indeed a knock on the door.   
He slid his phone in the back pocket of his jeans and crossed the room.   
“Good evening,” Dan said and saluted with a grin, passing the younger Dutchman.   
He closed the door behind the Aussie and pointed at his bed, the only seating accommodation apart from a single leathery armchair by the window.   
“Make yourself comfortable.”  
Dan did as he was told, letting himself fall down on the sheets Max had so carefully been straightening before.   
“Wanna drink something?”   
Dan smirked, “I was promised beer…?”   
Max laughed, “I knew you’d only come because of the beer.”   
He took two alcohol free bottles from the mini-fridge and passed one of them to his teammate.   
“Cheers!” Dan said and they clinked their drinks.   
“To what?”   
“Mh,” the Aussie made, shrugging his shoulders.   
“To the future,” Max proposed dramatically, suppressed laughter shaking his shoulders.   
“To the future!” Dan declared with a roll of his eyes, taking a long gulp of the beer.   
Max sat down next to his teammate and pressed a controller into his empty hand.   
“FIFA it is, then?”   
“FIFA it is.”   
  
Daniel was actually far from kicking Max’s ass, which had been to be expected, considering Max had probably years of training advantage compared to the Aussie.  
After about an hour, Dan let his controller sink and fell back against the cushions, sighing exhaustedly.   
“Okay, I definitely need a break right now.”   
An amused sound bubbled up Max throat and he grinned at his teammate, who had now closed his eyes and pretended to be snoring.   
It was weirdly peaceful.   
The young Dutch kept looking down at the older driver, watched how Dan blew a strand of dark curls out of his face, happily fake-sleeping in Max’s sheets.   
He pushed back the thoughts that naturally evoked from that sight and looked away with burning cheeks.   
When his gaze brushed over the Aussie once again, Daniel had pushed himself back up, holding himself up on his elbows.   
His dark eyes were sparkling.   
Max’s lips parted breathlessly.   
Dan opened his mouth to say something but Max jumped in first, “Excuse me for a sec!”   
Like stung by a bee, he got off the bed and fled into the en suite bathroom. Locking the door behind him, he pressed his back against it and did his best to suppress the urge to hit his head straight against the tiled wall.   
So he had taken approximately one step forward (making Dan feel better) and two steps back (using the information he got from extra-sim-card-Dan without his knowing and making his crush on the Aussie only worse by doing so).   
Max’s eyes fluttered shut and he opened the tab, spraying his face with some cold water.   
_Fucking hell. _

He jumped nervously when his ass suddenly started vibrating and with a hiss, he pulled his phone out of his pocket.

_U know what’s weird? _

Max’s gaze automatically went to the door, as if he could see right through it.   
His fingers were shaking when he typed: **What is?**

_Idk_

_For the first time in weeks, I’m feeling fine _

Max’s heart was beating in his throat and he suspected that if it were just a little bit louder, Dan would be able to hear it through the bathroom walls.

**What happened? **

_I’m with a friend _

Max stared at the little word that sent his heart flying, the one he had been craving to hear for so long.

_A co-worker, actually _

The Dutchman’s heart sunk.

**Another model, then? **

_Exactly _

**I’m glad ur having a good time **

Nervously glancing at the door, Max waited for Dan to reply.

_I wish it were like this more often_

**It’s probably easier than you’d think.**

Max answered the text and quickly stepped out of the room.   
He caught Dan with his phone still in his hands and it was messing with Max’s head.   
_So close and yet so far_.   
So Daniel was having a good time. Was feeling _fine_ for the first time in weeks. And he was the reason for that.   
_God_, how Max wished he could talk to Dan about it, tell him he was enjoying this so much himself but he knew that Daniel wasn’t enjoying it in the same way as Max did.   
It made him wonder if he ever would.

Max was aware that he was pushing his luck when he asked, “Texting someone?”   
But the big smile that lit up the Australian’s face made up for it.   
Daniel nodded in agreement.   
The younger one decided to better drop the issue there.   
“Up for another round?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a new chapter, yay!  
Tell me what you think and if you've liked it, please leave kudos :)  
-Johanna


	4. Chapter 4

**I had a shit day at work**

Max was on his way back home to Monaco, this time without Daniel as the older one would spend a few days with family and friends, as he knew.

_What happened? _

Max was chewing on his bottom lip, thinking about how to phrase it without being too obvious.

**I had to hand in some paperwork to my boss and while I’m on my way to his office, that fucker of a colleague runs into me and *accidentally* spills coffee all over my sheets**

_Damn, that sucks _

**Yeah, big time **

_Did he get away with it? _

**I talked to him about it n was a bit aggressive. My boss saw it and gave me a lecture about work climate and cohesion in a company.**

_Cohesion is important, tho _

Max smirked.

**Not when your co-worker’s a wanker **

_True_

Wasn’t this the perfect opportunity to find out a few things without making the older one suspicious?

**Sounds like you know what I’m talking about. What about your colleagues? **

_They’re quite difficult sometimes. Models, you know. It’s all about appearance and mind games from time to time. _

**I can imagine haha**

_No, you have no idea lol. It’s the worst sometimes. We had an almost-fistfight today. _

Max sucked in a sharp breath while he couldn’t hold in a chuckle at the same time. He gulped.

**A fistfight? Sounds interesting **

_Nah, it was actually stupid af _

Max couldn’t exactly agree with Dan on that but okay.

**So you’re not friends with any of your co-workers? Must suck **

_No, I am. Some are really great. But real friendships? Idk_

Max bit down on his bottom lip.

**Weren’t you with a colleague yesterday?**

_Yap, they’re a good one _

Daniel’s words made Max feel all warm and yet sick in his stomach at the same time.

Two days later, Max was sitting on his balcony, sipping coffee while looking over the sea. November had come and so had fall in Monte Carlo, a chilly breeze playing in the air.   
But the season wasn’t over yet, there was still so much to come with the final race in Abu Dhabi. Max still had points to take, positions to fight and guys to make happy. No, it truly wasn’t over yet.   
Despite all that, it kind of felt like the season had already ended, though.   
In that peaceful moment at home – which were rarer than anything was nowadays – Max felt all pressure wearing off.   
Just one more race until winter break, one more race until he would get to spend some quality time with his family and his friends for good.   
One more race until this equally frustrating and successful season would finally be over.   
He had title hopes for 2019.   
Red Bull had positioned him like that in the media and Max would be lying if he said he wasn’t hoping to race on a level with Mercedes and Ferrari in 2019.   
These thoughts naturally only led to the question if Renault would be able to hold their spot as “best of the rest”. Would they maybe even be able to come closer to the big three?   
Max hadn’t really talked to Daniel about why exactly he was leaving Red Bull. A team that surely had it flaws but was able to get them on a podium. Renault? He wasn’t so sure about that yet.   
So sure, they had talked about it and Dan had told him about how he felt like he needed a change, how an era was coming to an end to make space for a new beginning…   
But the _Why?_ never quite left the Dutchman’s mind.

There wasn’t anything peaceful about the moment anymore when the screen of Max’s phone, which was resting in his lap, suddenly lit up.

_I’m in Monaco _

Max blinked. Once, twice, and then a third time. Of course Daniel was. He was probably sitting on his own balcony just two levels below.

**Sooo?**

_Aren’t you in Monaco? _

Max’s breath got caught in his lungs and had to fight the urge to lean over the railing, just to make sure that Dan wasn’t actually just a few meters away. What was he supposed to do? Pose another lie?

**That’s where I live, yes**

So he went with something vary.

_There’s a Halloween party_

_Tomorrow evening. U interested in going? _

Max gulped and nearly spit out the coffee he had been sipping on. Now really wasn’t a good time to let his cover slip.

**You’re in Monte Carlo? **

_Obviously. So? _

A Halloween Party? Wasn’t Halloween like, two weeks ago?

_C’mon, theme parties are fun_

**I’m not sure it’s my kind of fun**

_What is your kind of fun? _

Max was slowly starting to panic. Dan wouldn’t let this slip easily, would he?

**Texting? **

_Lol. _

**I’m serious, I’m not a party guy**

_That much I’ve guessed. Wanna hang out in private, then? I’d be free today _

Oh God. Oh fucking hell. What in heaven’s sake had Max ever done to deserve this? He ignored the fact that he and he only was responsible for this and bit down on the inside of his cheek.

**No, party is ok**

A party was definitely better than having to face Daniel in private. And it would be way less rude to just not show up to a party than not to show up to a private date.

_Splendid! I’ll text you the address. _

Max buried his face in his hands and let out a groan so loud that Dan had probably heard it if he was indeed sitting on his own balcony at the moment. And if he by some miracle hadn’t done so, he definitely heard how Max’s fist slammed down on the table, knocking over his cup of coffee in the process.   
One day. He would have just one day to somehow sort this mess out.   
Two options: Go to the party and tell the truth to Dan and therefore have the Aussie be angry at _him_ or not going to the party, make up some excuse and make Daniel angry at the _stranger_ he was telling all his secrets.  
Max groaned again and huffed, chin resting on his arms.   
He should have told Dan the truth before the Aussie had started spilling all the secrets he wasn’t telling anyone else about to him, should have warned his teammate before he had placed his trust in the anonymity of an accident. But their texting had grown on Max and he knew that it had probably also grown on Daniel.   
Which was why he knew he’d have to end this but also knew he would not be able to. He needed to clear his head. Maybe then, he’d come up with a solution how not to destroy the fragile relationship he had built with Dan lately.   
The truth would only add to the older one’s loneliness, wouldn’t it?   
The Dutchman then decided to go for a run, actually keen on clearing his mind, if only for the length of the exercise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tell me your thoughts in the comments :)
> 
> \- Johanna


	5. Chapter 5

His lungs were hurting by the time he had run round the harbour two times and headed back to the apartment complex he was living in. Apart from physical strain, the running hadn’t brought much to him and certainly not some peace of mind. Instead, the questions were now pacing through his head like some sort of mantra.   
He took a shortcut through a park and must have been so caught up in his thoughts that he didn’t notice the backstabbing roots of an old tree that made him tumble and eventually fall.   
Max hit the ground hard and started cursing the tree when something hit his head lightly, sliding down his cheek before it landed in his opened palm.   
His instinct told him to drop the foreign item as fast as possible but its shiny colour irritated him, reflecting the November sun beautifully.   
Only then he identified the object as three hazelnuts, the hazels being held together.   
Max usually wasn’t someone to get sentimental about such things but he felt drawn towards the object and stayed on the ground for another few minutes, flipping over the nuts in his hand to see how the light seemed to get tangled up in it, making it sparkle in the most fascinating way.   
His gaze went up the tree but he couldn’t spot any more of them. And didn’t hazelnuts grow on bushes instead of trees?   
Max frowned but closed his hand around the three hazels anyway.

He took them home and set them aside on a cupboard in his bedroom.   
He forgot about it until the next day, until Max was downright freaking out.   
Daniel had texted him the address of the venue along with the time he’d be there and there were only two hours left. Max would have to make a move now. This would probably blow up in his face anyway so why not go to the party?   
He could ask Carlos to come along or someone else that Daniel respected enough to not make him a murder witness.   
Maybe it wouldn’t go so bad, after all.   
On the other hand, he had to think of the loneliness in Dan’s eyes. Of how he wasn’t willing to talk to Max about his struggles and how Max had lied and manipulated him.   
Dan would get over this easily. And with them no longer sharing a garage after Abu Dhabi, there wouldn’t even be the need to get along with each other. There wouldn’t be anything forcing them to get over themselves and get along.   
So yes, Max was panicking, pacing through his apartment restlessly, kicking shoes out of his way and throwing a few pillows from one end of the couch to the other angrily.   
He’d text Dan he wouldn’t make it to the party. He’d make up a plausible excuse and promise that they’d meet again some time soon. Which Max knew would give him a few weeks extra time, as Dan would be on holidays after Abu Dhabi, after his last days at the factory.   
So that was the plan.   
Max stumbled through the flat to get to his phone.   
God, how he wished there was another possibility. How he wished he’d be able to go to that party without disappointing the Australian.   
He pushed the bedroom door open and cringed when it hit a cupboard.   
He truly wished he had another option.   
The Dutch turned towards the cupboard to reach for his phone, but ended up shrieking at the sight of what was placed there.   
Folded neatly, he found a full body lion costume. Full body including a gigantic lion head made of plush. The bright orange mane was quite impressive, actually.   
Max’s gaze shot through the room, he even checked if he had forgot to lock the front door but he couldn’t find anything suspicious in his apartment. When he came back into his bedroom, he noticed that one of the three hazels was lying on the floor. It must have fallen down when he had knocked the door into the cupboard.   
He picked up the nut and realized that it was not reflecting the light anymore in the way that it had done before. He frowned in confusion.   
What was this all about?   
His eyes went back to the costume that was still resting on the cupboard, owning the space as if it had never _not_ been there.   
Wasn’t this exactly what he needed? An option to go to the party without Dan knowing who he was?   
He quickly stepped into the costume, pulled it over his jeans and t-shirt and eventually put on the lion’s head.   
It was hard to breathe in there and net made it able to still see properly while no way in hell someone would be able to guess what face was hidden beneath the bright mane and whiskers.   
Max hurried to get a look at himself in the mirror.   
Yes. Perfect.   
The costume was incredibly ugly and extraordinarily cringy but it was absolutely perfect for the occasion. Max nodded contently.   
This was exactly what he needed.   
Max checked his watch.   
He'd have to shed it for the party. Even though it was hidden away by the lion’s paws, he did not want to risk revealing his identity with such a simple thing.   
He therefore went with ordinary sneakers and a cologne Vic had bought for him, of which he was sure that he had never worn it in Dan’s presence. 

When Max stood in front of the club about two hours later, he couldn’t tell whether it was his thrumming heart or the hammering bass coming from inside that made his body tingle. 90s music was blasting in the club and when Max had paid the entrance fee – something he hadn’t done in years, not even in Monaco – he was immediately swallowed up by costumes and heated bodies, by zombies and witches and bare skin.   
The smell of a fog machine reached his nose and lightning seemed to flash through the dimly lit club, from time to time followed by rumbling thunder.   
He elbowed his way through people and eventually found a more quiet spot in the back of the area, where he had space enough to get his phone out of the inside pocket of his costume. He saw that Daniel had texted him.

_Exited to meet you_

_Just one more thing; I’m not actually a Victoria’s Secret model_

Max smirked down at the message and shook his head slightly, typing a reply in amusement.

**Whaaat? You’re not? My world is shattered**

_I am so so sorry ;) _

**I BET you are**

Max then remembered that a real stranger wouldn’t know how to spot the Australian, as they had never before exchanged pictures of themselves, for obvious reasons.   
Max due to the fear of being recognised and Dan – well, probably because of the same thing, just different.

**How am I supposed to recognize you? **

_Oh, you will. No worries. _

Max did not know what to make of the text and his eyes instinctively flickered through the overcrowded room. Before he could get back to the messages, something caught his gaze, though.   
And then Max pretty well died.

Right then and there, Max’s heart simply decided it should stop working because the innocent life he had lived before would never ever be the same again, anyway.   
Only his heart didn’t _really_ stop, only skipped a few beats, beating even faster afterwards.   
It left Max staring opened mouthed at the scene in front of him, which was covered up by the lion’s head, thank fucking God.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah, ehem, well, the next part is definitely a fantasy of mine that I think about way too often...   
any guesses? ;)


	6. Chapter 6

Daniel was standing a few meters away from him.  
He was wearing black skinny jeans so tight that they shouldn’t be legal but that was not what made Max choke to death.   
That were the white and feathery wings dripping in gold and silver, angelically spreading widely over Dan’s back and shoulders.   
And as if that wasn’t enough, Dan wore a bra covered in sparkly gemstones, decorated by jewellery. A thin golden necklace embellished with diamonds accented the Australian’s neck, disappeared in the bra and then went in a straight line down Daniel’s toned chest, resting on the abs of his flat chest before the jewellery parted again, going around the older one’s hips once.   
And Dan wore it all like it was nothing, a grin so bright it illuminated the whole room playing on his lips. The wings made it hard to make a way through the crowd but all heads turned in direction of the Australian anyway, everyone stepping aside to make space for him.   
A Victoria’s Secret model.   
A secret indeed.

Max, in the meantime, was still gulping, staring at Daniel with his jaw slacked and eyes wide open, mouth dry, tongue darting out to wet his dry lips and get rid of the tightness of his throat.   
Daniel wasn’t heading anywhere, instead he stopped in the middle of the dance floor and looked around the room, eventually taking out his phone.   
Max’s one vibrated in his hands shortly after.

_Spotted me yet? _

Max nodded dumb-struck until he remembered that Dan – of course – couldn’t see that.

**Yes**.

_You like it? Haha_

Gosh, what was Dan thinking? Was he aware of the things his costume did to Max? Was he aware of what it did to his _body_?   
Was Dan _trying_ to be this sexual or hadn’t he spared a single thought for it?

Max gathered all of his courage, oxygen filling his lungs, and stepped on the dancefloor.

“I do.”   
Dan turned around at him with wide eyes, curiosity written all over his face.   
Max had tested it. The lion head that made him feel like a mascot at a baseball game was so thick and stifling that it almost completely muffled his voice, making it barely possible for Dan to recognize his voice. Especially with the loud 90s music still playing on full volume.   
Being this close to Dan only made it worse.   
The Australian’s eyes then lit up and he suddenly pulled Max into a hug without a warning, holding him so close that the bra wires poked into the Dutchman’s chest. And what was Max supposed to do with one armful of Daniel Ricciardo instead of hugging him right back, resting his chin on top of Dan’s shoulder?   
“I can’t tell you how exited I am that you are here!” Dan screamed into Max’s ear or where he probably suspected his ear was, under the lion mane and all that fluff.   
Dan then took a step back to look at Max again, who was shrinking under his teammate’s gaze.   
He nodded, the only posture Dan would get and swallowed hard.   
“You okay?” Dan looked down at himself, “it’s a bit much, isn’t it?” He cocked his head and grinned.   
Holy Lord above.   
A bit much? Was Daniel aware that Max was facing the heaviest crisis of his life because of the older driver’s outfit?   
When Max didn’t answer, Dan came a little closer again, bringing his lips closer to the lion head, “I guess you figured I’m not actually a Victoria’s Secret model. And in case you recognize me, just know that nothing changes between us, okay?”   
Dan seemed to sigh but Max couldn’t tell for sure with the music playing in the background.   
“I’m still super glad we _met_.” Dan put the last words into hypothetical quotation marks and stepped back.   
Great.  
So Dan thought that Max was intimidated by who the Aussie actually was, as if the Dutch hadn’t known who he was, as if he hadn’t had any idea who’d be standing in front of him today.   
And Max _was_ completely intimidated, if though for other reasons than Dan had made out.

Max wanted to tell Dan it was okay, wanted to tell him all the things he didn’t dare to speak out loud but his lips simply did not want to part, the sane part of his brain keeping them sealed tight.   
But Dan seemed to be too excited to notice any of his inner struggles and Max jumped when he felt Daniel’s fingers curling around his, squeezing his hand once before letting go.  
“Wanna dance?”   
Max nodded, once again glad of not having skipped neck day lately, as the head seemed to weigh about 100 kilos.   
Dan smiled and then he chewed on his bottom lip, almost sheepishly.   
He hid not jump another time when he felt Dan’s fingers against his this time, instead he let the Aussie pull him along, closer to the DJ.   
A song Max recognized as “Broken” started playing and due to the lack of space, they were now standing so close that Dan’s bra was brushing against Max’s chest once again.   
Thankfully, Dan couldn’t see the blush that was hidden away by the plush head.   
“You’re not much of a talker, are you?” Dan asked when he leaned in, smiling amusedly.   
Max shook his head and cleared his throat.   
“I’m a little overwhelmed.”   
“Because of my costume?”   
Max nodded.   
“I had hoped you’d like it.” Dan smirked and Max swallowed another time.   
Was Dan flirting with him?   
Max couldn’t help the heat that spread in his stomach.   
The Aussie was basically half dressed and had hoped that Max would like it?   
No. No.   
He had hoped that the guy he had met _online, anonymously_, would like it. The guy that wasn’t Max. The guy that wasn’t someone who had betrayed Daniel’s trust.   
“Will you ever…” Dan pointed at the lion’s head, “take that off?”   
Max shook his head and the older one laughed.   
“Come on, I know you’re not a sixty year old pervert.”   
Max felt Dan’s fingers resting on his stomach.   
“Or you are an extremely fit sixty years old pervert, which I could live with.” Dan smirked and Max lightly punched the Aussie’s shoulder.  
“Come on, don’t be shy! I wanna see you!”   
_Of course you do._   
“Later!” Max declared and Dan seemed to be satisfied for now.   
“I’ll take you at your words!” the Aussie called right back.   
  
Alcohol.   
Alcohol was what Max needed now more than ever before.   
“Let me buy us some beer!” he therefore shouted, trying his best to make himself heard over the music.   
“I’m stoked!”   
They made their way over to the bar, where it was considerably quieter and where they found to places two sit. Max paid for their beers and headed back to where Dan was sitting, handing him his.  
Dan smiled and clinked their bottles together.   
“To girls who give you false numbers,” he said with a smirk and took a long gulp of his beer.   
Max, in foresight, had gotten himself a straw, as it was impossible to drink straight from the bottle with the head on.   
Daniel simply chuckled at the sight.   
“So,” the Aussie eventually said, his eyes wandering over Max’s costume, “will you take off the head now?”   
“I can’t,” Max answered and Dan rolled his eyes, though he seemed to be a little confused.   
“Why? You’re not too shy, are you?”   
Max shrugged his shoulders because he couldn’t think of anything to say, didn’t come up with anything that didn’t sound stupid as fuck and like a lame excuse.   
“You ARE shy!”   
Dan took another sip of his beer and set the bottle down on the small table in front of them.   
“You don’t have to be, it’s just me!”   
_It's never ‘just you’_, Max thought, but kept his mouth tightly sealed. Instead, he found himself getting lost in Dan’s dark and curious eyes and oh my God, had Dan applied some eyeliner?   
He nearly choked on his beer and Dan clapped his back a few times.   
“Better?”   
Max nodded.   
“I thought you wouldn’t show up,” Dan admitted, ducking his head as if he was actually embarrassed for thinking that, “I mean, how big were the chances in the first place that you and I live at the same place?”   
Max wanted to close his eyes and never open them ever again.   
“Sorry for lying to you, by the way,” a flustered brush appeared on the Australian’s face and Max sucked in a sharp breath.   
“It’s fine,” Max mumbled, hearing his blood rushing in his ears.   
He flinched when Dan gently touched his wrist and the older one pulled back his hand apologetically.   
“I’m sorry,” he said, guilt flashing over his face, “look.”  
Dan took in a deep breath, his naked chest heaving, “I’m really sorry that I didn’t tell you who I am. And I’m sorry if that’s the reason why you’re shy.”   
Dan pointed at the lion head again and for a second, his serious face was split apart by an amused twitching of his lips. The worry was back in his eyes in an instant, though.   
“Just… Just know that I’m not special because some people recognize my face on the streets. I’m pretty ordinary.”   
Max mentally counted to five, biting down on his tongue so hard that it drew blood.   
“Alrighty… What I’m trying to say is that please, please, don’t be grossed out by it. I…” Dan’s gaze was searching Max’s face (or rather, the lion head) rapidly. It made Max wonder if it made it easier for Dan to keep talking about his feelings with the stupid head on, if Dan was so used to only opening up in anonymity by now that it had become as comforting as an old friend.   
“So yes…” Dan suddenly extended a hand, “I’m Daniel. Or Danny. Or just Dan. Whatever you like.”   
Max swallowed when he realized that he was supposed to say his own name now.   
“And you are…?”   
Max pretended not to have heard the question.  
Dan grinned, “Nice to meet you, Mr.”  
When silence spread between them again, Max eventually fished his phone out of his pocket and started typing. Dan watched in confusion until he pulled his own phone from his jeans.

**Sorry I’m being so weird  
It’s all so new  
Please don’t think I don’t like u**

Max looked up at the older one sheepishly and waited for a reaction.   
He know how big Dan’s smiles could be, being around the Aussie as a teammate made it nearly impossible to miss, but the smile the Australian shot into his direction after reading the text messages was something else.   
With twitching lips, Dan started typing himself.

_Would be easier to forgive you if you took off that bloody head now_

**Later**

“Later,” Dan’s lips formed the words, echoing Max’s message silently.

_When is later?  
After some more dancing?_

Max really did not feel like dancing, sitting was perfectly fine for him, but Dan was batting his eyelashes at him with a smirk.   
“Please?” Daniel asked and Max felt his resistance melt away.   
So Dan touched his wrist again and pulled him back on the dancefloor, 90s music still blasting from the speakers.   
Max, born in the late 90s, couldn’t exactly find it in him to like that style of music and suspected that Dan with his love for Australian post-core bands would agree with him on that, but it wasn’t so bad after all when he felt the rhythm down to his bones.   
He was a horrible dancer, mind you, but so was Dan, who did not seemed to care about that fact for a second.   
Instead, he was slamming his shoulder against the Dutchman’s, “Come on, mate, have some fun!”   
And they had.   
Max realized that he hadn’t had that much fun in a while. Having Dan dance in front of him, his hips brushing against his own occasionally, the enormous wings tingling Max’s skin. Not even the current races were able to compete with that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I want to make clear that at the time that I wrote this fanfic, I was unaware of the problemacy of Victoria's Secret and as that company refuses to include trans* models, I do not support them in any way.


	7. Chapter 7

The next song that came on was some version of “Ti amo” that Max did not know and would have never felt the need to.   
But Dan clutched his heart in an overly dramatic way, grinning widely.   
“I’m partly Italian, you know that?”   
Max luckily caught himself and shook his head, watching with horror how Dan took both of his hands, or rather; paws, and started spinning him around, singing along to the song totally off-key (which was luckily covered up by the music itself).   
Dan took another spin, tangling them up in a way that made Max find himself trapped with his back against the older man’s chest. He could feel Daniel’s breath against his necks, their locked hands resting against his own stomach.   
It was already warm in his full-body costume but in Dan’s arms, Max felt heat rushing through his body.   
When he felt the vibrations of Dan laughing, shivers ran down the younger one’s spine. For a moment, Dan leaned his forehead against the back of Max’s neck, still chuckling.   
And suddenly, Max felt like he could not breathe anymore, as if his heart wasn’t pumping blood through his veins but had stopped working altogether. He tried to inhale through his mouth, his breath becoming quicker, heartrate faster. His head started spinning while his legs felt like giving in, Dan still so close, way _too_ close.

He ducked away and pushed past Dan’s arms, stumbling into the crowd, past sweaty bodies and past reproachful glances.   
_Breathebreathebreathebreathebreathe_  
Max didn’t look back and picked up speed, pushed a Dracula out of the way and spun around a skeleton, started running through the corridor, down the hall and then finally, eventually, he escaped the club and was hit by the Monacan night air.   
He took a deep breath, then a second and a third, but it still felt like there wasn’t any oxygen filling his lungs and Max realized, in panic, that he was hyperventilating.   
He went down in a squatting position, back leaned against the bricks, facing the night sky.   
And then he recapitulated.   
Max closed his eyes.

He hurried to get home, did not dare to take off the heat in case someone would recognize and take a picture of him. That definitely would have been the end.   
When he arrived at his apartment, he felt as if he had just run a full marathon. His lungs hurt and he had been sweating, the cool night air making him freeze at the same time.   
With a hammering heart, Max stepped out of his costume and the clothes he wore underneath and got into the shower.   
The hot water managed to ease away the tension in his shoulders and he let it run down his back, head hanging low, one hand pressed against the wet tiles to keep him hip.   
Max did not want to think about Daniel.   
But there wasn’t much else on his mind while he was warmed up by the comfortable spray of his shower.   
What the fuck had he been thinking?  
He should have known that it would be a horrible idea to attend the party.   
He should have known that being this close to the Australian would only make things worse.   
And _God_, how much worse they had been, with Dan’s breath in his neck, his body almost leaning into Max.   
The Dutchman had felt it, had been able to imagine how it would have felt to turn around in Daniel’s arms and pull him in. Pull him in so close that he would have been able to feel Dan’s heart beating against his chest.   
Would he have found it being as fast as Max’s had done?   
He shook his head, leaning back against the warm shower wall.   
For Dan, Max was a stranger.   
A stranger that had betrayed his confidence.   
There wouldn’t be a way to make up for it without telling Dan the truth. Which really wasn’t an option, all things considered.

Feeling numb, Max stepped out of the shower and put on a pair of comfortable pants and a Red Bull shirt. He’d just go to sleep now.   
He had wanted to ignore his phone for the rest of the night, for the rest of his life, probably, but it caught his eye when he was on his way into the kitchen to get a glass of water.

A message from Dan.

So far so good, that had been to be expected.   
He frowned, though, when he realized that Dan hadn’t texted his extra sim card but the actual number of one Max Verstappen.   
His heart speeded up once again immediately. His gaze flickered to the clock above the door. 01:10 am. What could Dan possibly want at this hour of the day?

_You home? _

In confusion, Max answered the text and literally jumped when his doorbell rang a second later.   
With his phone in his hand, he opened the door and gaped at the sight in front of him.   
  
Daniel was still wearing the jeans he had worn earlier, but he had changed into a black low cut tank top. The wings had disappeared as well.   
There wasn’t anything left that would have indicated how the Aussie had looked just an hour ago.   
They stared at each other for what felt like an eternity to Max, whose heart was beating in his throat and who had went pale as death himself.   
Fear spread in his bones and he swallowed hard.   
But then an apologetic and shy smile spread on the older one’s lips and some of the tension in Max’s body was relieved. So Dan probably wasn’t here to kill him.   
But how else had he found out?   
“I…” the older one started but didn’t finish his sentence, rubbing the back of his neck, flustered. He then turned on his heels, shrugging his shoulders, “maybe I shouldn’t’ve come here.”   
Max’s eyes widened and he instinctively reached out to grab Daniel’s arm and pulled him back, “No! What do you want?”   
Max coughed, “Sorry. That came out sounding rude. I meant; what can I do for you?”   
Dan’s gaze came back to him and the Aussie seemed torn between staying and leaving.   
His glance wandered over Max face, curiously, and the Dutch felt stripped beneath it, as if Dan could read all of his secrets by just giving his face a good look.   
“I guess I need some distraction,” Daniel eventually said and Max’s eyes widened.   
Dan let out a laugh, “No! Not in that way!”   
He chuckled, but the amused sound got lost along the way until his face was serious again.   
Max sighed and suppressed the guilt that made its way to the surface.   
“Come in, Dan.”   
He stepped aside and crumpled under Daniel’s grateful gaze.   
The older one followed him into the kitchen where they stared at each other for a few seconds with the lights out, until Max lit a small light over the sink.   
“What do you want to drink? I have…” he opened the fridge, “ehm, water?”   
“Water is perfectly fine. Thanks, Max.”   
Max liked that about Dan.   
How he always used his name when addressing him.   
The Dutchman filled two glasses with tab water.   
“We should go to the living room, huh? And then you can tell me…” he paused, feeling unwell, “and then you can tell me why you’re here and what happened?”   
Dan nodded and took his glass of water.

They settled on Max’s not that big couch, each at one end.   
Daniel drew in his legs and placed a cushion on his lap, which he held onto tightly.   
“Are you cold?” Max asked and handed the Aussie a blanket without waiting for his response.   
“Thanks,” Dan answered and shot him a small smile.   
“So…” Max eventually started, nervously nipping on his glass of water.   
“So…” Dan repeated and let out a sigh. He scratched his neck another time.   
“I guess I need some advice.”   
“Advice…” Max repeated, “from me.”   
“Not from you specifically, but from a friend. And we are friends, after all,” the corners of Dan’s mouth were twitching but there was a certain kind of sadness to it.   
Max looked down, digging his short nails deep into his palms while a lump formed in his throat.   
“Okay, then.”   
Dan took a deep breath.   
“I know that what I’m about to tell you is stupid and you’ll tell me it’s especially stupid for someone like us but I-…” Dan paused, eyes focused on anywhere but Max.   
The Dutchman, in the meantime, grew more and more uncomfortable.   
“Dan,” he said, “I have no idea what you’re even talking about.”   
The lie burned on his tongue but at least he managed to keep a straight face.   
“Yeah. Yeah, right. Sorry.”   
Dan shifted a little on the couch in order to find a more comfortable position.   
“So like, two months ago, I guess? Someone accidentally texted me and we then started talking.”   
“Accidentally?” Max bit down on his tongue and suppressed the urge to hiss out in pain.   
Daniel nodded, “They were handed a wrong number by a date or something.”  
When Max didn’t say anything, Dan continued talking.   
“It started out with some real stupid and basic stuff. Some jokes, some memes, complaints about work, the usual.”   
Max felt like his whole body was tingling from listening to Dan talk.   
“But it got personal over time, you know? It was easy to talk about problems with some guy I didn’t even know and probably wouldn’t ever meet, anyway.”   
Max’s throat felt tight, “Someone who has no idea who you are.”   
The Aussie looked up at him, “Exactly. They didn’t know who I am or what I do or of any of the shit happening at Red Bull. I think I…”   
Dan scoffed and shrugged his shoulders, “I think I got a bit carried away.”   
“Carried away?”   
A sad smile spread on Dan’s lips.   
“I felt like my secrets weren’t just safe with him but that he… I don’t know… truly understood what I was talking about, you know?”   
_Oh, trust me, I know._   
“I think I understand.”   
“They’ve… _He_ has grown onto me, I guess.”   
By now, Max’s skin felt as if it was on fire.   
“How… How can I help you with that?” he asked tentatively, testing the waters.   
Dan huffed softly, shaking this head, “I have no idea.”   
“So what happened today? You wouldn’t be here if nothing had happened, would you?”   
Max hoped that Dan did not pick up on the bitterness that had sneaked into his tone.   
“We wanted to meet,” Dan was speaking in a low voice and something in Max’s stomach turned at the realization that the Aussie was blushing.   
“I mean, we did meet.”   
“How?”  
Dan’s gaze flickered up.   
“He said he lives in Monaco. So I invited him to this Halloween Party.”  
“Did he show up?”   
Dan nodded, “He did.”   
“Then what happened?”   
“He was wearing that costume with a big lion head. Made it impossible to get a real look at him and he did not want to take it off.”   
Max traced the imprints his nails had left with his fingers.   
“Why?”   
It took Dan a couple of seconds to find the right words, “I think he noticed me and panicked.”   
Max swallowed.   
“I think that’s understandable. He had no idea that you’re a celeb before?”   
“I wouldn’t call us celebrities, Max.”  
Despite the tension, Max managed to roll his eyes.   
“But no, he had no idea.”  
“What _did_ you tell him before?”  
Dan’s cheeks were burning red by now and Max’s heart skipped a beat.   
“We had that inside joke. Don’t expect me to tell you!”  
The Dutchman raised his hands in defence and waited for his teammate to continue.   
“This sounds so stupid but despite me never seeing his face and despite us being strangers… I felt like we connected. Like we were supposed to be together, at that point in time.”   
Max drew in a breath so sharp that it made Dan look up at him.   
“Stupid. Like I said.”   
Max stared at the older man, at the disappointment in his frame.   
“I don’t think it’s stupid.”   
Max truly didn’t but _how_ was he supposed to explain everything to Daniel, how was he supposed to turn this mess into anything good?   
“I fucked everything up!” Dan suddenly declared, dark eyes sparkling with anger.   
“I fucked up by not telling him who I was earlier. He could have got used to it slowly. He could have said it if was making him feel uncomfortable. Instead, I just confronted him with everything. No wonder he fled from me.”  
_Oh Dan_, Max thought.   
Dan had been the one left behind without any explanation and yet he was the one feeling like crap? Wasn’t he supposed to curse that guy into all eternity?   
“So you want to forgive him?” Max asked haltingly and Dan’s gaze snapped up, facing him.   
“It’s sick, I know,” Dan admitted and Max felt drawn towards the Australian, wanted to reach out a hand and cup Daniel’s jaw, wanted to make sure that the guilt in the older one’s eyes would fade but he held back, knowing that he was just being selfish and wanted Dan to rid him of his own guilt.   
“I can understand that you’ve found a friend in that person,” Max said, slowly, “and I understand that you blame yourself. But it really isn’t your fault, Dan.”   
“I’m not so sure about that, but thanks for saying that, Maxy. You’ve really grown a lot this year.”   
Dan smiled tentatively and the younger one wasn’t sure how to feel about his friend’s words.   
Dan would never see more in him than his reckless younger teammate.   
“So what do you plan to do now?” the Dutch asked, fingers trembling slightly.   
Something in Dan’s dark eyes suddenly lit up, as if an idea was forming behind his eyes, “I’ll message him right now! Tell him I want to meet him tomorrow and talk things through!”   
Dan pulled out his phone and Max watched in panic how he typed in his message.   
And then, with panic turning into full horror-mode, Max realized that his own phone was lying on the couch table.   
A few seconds after the Aussie had apparently sent the message, the screen of the phone on the table lit up.   
Dan’s gaze went sideways.   
Max reached out, almost fell of the couch to grab the phone before Dan could read his own name on the display, and fell half off the sofa by doing so.   
“My dad!” Max exclaimed, cheeks on fire.   
“Your dad?” Dan asked and the younger one could hear the confusion in his voice.   
Quick! Don’t act suspiciously!   
“Yeah, probably about Vic’s and his flight to Abu Dhabi next week,” he waved it off and tried to play cool while his heart was hammering against his ribs, “now what about your mysterious chat partner? Did he read the message?”   
The confusion on Dan’s face vanished and he went back to facing his own phone, shaking his head.   
“Not yet.”  
“Maybe he’s already asleep,” Max proposed and faked a yawn.   
“You’re probably right. I’ll just have to wait.”   
Dan smiled, “And you’re tired.”   
He checked his phone for the time.   
“I’ll get going. Thanks for listening, Max.”  
Dan held the younger one’s gaze for a few seconds, before he got up and reorganized the couch. Max followed his example.   
Before Dan left, he leaned against the doorway and eyed the younger one.   
“Anything else?” Max asked in a low voice.   
Dan shrugged his shoulder, running a hand through his black curls. Max tried not to notice how the muscles of his arms flexed in motion.   
“Sorry I backed out lately. I kinda miss us hanging out frequently.”   
Max smiled shyly, “Me too, Dan.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please tell me your thoughts on this and leave kudos :)


	8. Chapter 8

Abu Dhabi.   
Oh, what a place to be.   
The last race of a season was always special, no matter the circuit but Abu Dhabi was truly something else. The energy that came with crossing the finish line under floodlights, how the colours were more vibrant, the flying sparks more visible never failed to amaze Max.   
He looked forward to each part of it, to the Free Practises starting with the sun up high in the sky, ending with a sunset and night itself.   
He was looking forward to the end of 2018, excited for the holidays that were to come afterwards.  
And yet, Max wasn’t able to fully concentrate on all of this, wasn’t able to find that usual excitement in his bones.   
Instead, he was nervous wherever he went, impatient whenever someone was talking to him.   
He knew that he would not be able to ignore Daniel’s messages forever.   
That he didn’t even want to ignore them, mind you.   
But he also did not have the slightest clue what he was supposed to answer to Dan’s “_please don’t hate me_”s or “_we could try to get to know each other slowly_”s.   
Buying a new phone was what he had done.   
He now owned one for his usual number and one that contained the extra sim card. By doing so, he wanted to eliminate the risk of Daniel accidentally getting his hands on his phone, since accidents had sort of become their thing lately.

The last race of the season also meant the last race, ever, with Dan as a teammate at Red Bull. There would be no going back, they’d drive this last weekend, meet for a few shots at the factory and then that would be it.   
Their shared time with the Bulls would be ending.   
For Max, there had never been a time at Red Bull without the Australian and it was hard to imagine the garage without his older teammate.   
He knew that it would be different with Pierre.   
Pierre wasn’t as funny as Dan or as cheerful or a mate as good as Daniel was.   
He would miss the Aussie around, with his laughs and his jokes, his music and his temper.   
Despite knowing that Dan would be just down the pit lane, Max was aware that things would change massively and he wasn’t sure if he was ready to let Dan leave.   
Not that it was his choice to make, though.   
Daniel would leave the team and there was nothing he could do about that.   
And after weeks of talking to Dan via text, he felt like he was understanding the older one’s reasons for leaving. Which did not mean that he agreed with them.   
And he wondered what Dan was thinking about his move.   
Was he haunted by some last minute regret?   
Was he worried about it?   
Did he, perhaps, feel some of the sadness Max certainly felt at the thought of leaving all of it – all of Max – behind?   
The Dutchman hadn’t dared to bring up the topic.   
And as they hadn’t been texting each other since the Halloween incident, he had no idea what Daniel was actually thinking.   
Max had kept his new phone hidden away in his motorhome, safely tucked away in a bag he hadn’t opened since he had arrived a few days ago.   
And it was easy to get his mind off everything at the moment, as his sister, who he hadn’t seen in weeks, had arrived earlier the day.   
But as hard as Vic tried to cheer him up – she definitely noticed that something was off – she did not manage to distract him entirely.   
Again and again, Max caught himself staring at Daniel from the other end of the garage.   
He found himself taking in the sight of the Aussie in his Red Bull suit as if Dan would retire after the week end.   
Because that’s what some part of him felt like, didn’t it?  
Racing without Dan in the same team would not be the same and he couldn’t be sure that things between them would still be the same next season.   
The majority of the time that they had spent with each other over the last years had been because of the Red Bull promo and because they had been traveling together. All of it would stop once Dan would leave for Red Bull.   
Max felt heat boiling in his stomach at the thought that Hulkenberg would get to do all the things he had done with Dan, that he would get to film funny videos with the Aussie and share flights back home.   
That he wouldn’t get to watch the older one fall asleep in a plane after an exhausting race anymore, that he would not be the one to hear Dan’s raspy voice after he woke up.

Apparently, he had been staring for so long and so suspiciously that Daniel had picked up on it because when Max’s gaze zoomed back into reality, the older one was staring right back at him with a curious expression on his face.   
Max averted his glance quickly, knocking over a stack of tyres in the process of turning away from the Australian, cheeks on fire.   
God, he’d miss Dan. So much.

Friday night was the first time since he had bought the new phone that he actually turned it on and opened his chat with Dan.   
If he wasn’t able to get things off his chest as real-Max, why not get at least some good out of this mess?

**I miss you**

It was just three words, so simple and yet anything but, making Max feel as if something heavy had been lifted from his shoulders only to be dropped on his chest.   
He pulled the thin blanket over his head and waited for a reply, wondering if Dan was already asleep. Or maybe he had blocked his number or something. Maybe he had moved on with life.

_Bloody hell, this took you a really long time, mate_

Max let out a sound of relief and rolled onto his back.

**I’m sorry  
For everything**

_You better be  
You didn’t reply to any of my messages_

**I’m sorry**

_I thought you wouldn’t text me ever again_

**I could never do that**

_I wasn’t so sure_

**You mean too much to me**

_I wasn’t so sure about that either_

**It’s true**

Now that truly wasn’t a lie from Max.

**At the party…   
I was overwhelmed**

_I guessed that much and I have to apologize for not telling you beforehand_

**Don’t be sorry, please  
I shouldn’t have left without a word**

And Max felt safe with the messages because nothing he could say would be able to haunt him later, would it? He could tell Dan without having to face the consequences. Dan would never know.

**You’re special to me, Daniel. I was overwhelmed by that at the party. **

When Dan did not reply, despite having read the message, Max continued typing.

**You were so close, I could feel your breath on my neck, n I panicked   
I’m not used to that**

_To what? _

**Never mind. Forget I said that. **

_What if I don’t want to? _

**There’s not one logical reason why you shouldn’t **

_Maybe I was overwhelmed, too_

Max sucked in a sharp breath and sat up in his dark bedroom, body tingling.

**Overwhelmed by what?** he typed in with trembling fingers.

_I felt like we connected  
Fuck, idk, I felt like we were destined to be there, with each other   
That sounds so cheesy  
Idek if you like men  
I’m sorry_

Dan’s messages came so quick that Max wondered how the Aussie could possibly type that fast. His heart picked up speed and something in his chest clinched painfully.

**U don’t even know me**

_I know. Sorry. This is so stupid. _

**It is**

Max bit down on his tongue.

**But I can’t say I don’t know what u r talking about **

_This whole situation is truly fucked_

Oh, Max couldn’t agree more with Daniel on that.   
He did not come up with anything to reply to that and instead, he kept reading and re-reading what Daniel had messaged him earlier. Was it possible? Possible that Dan had developed feelings for the stranger he had met _online_? Or had he felt that connection when they had actually met because it had been _Max_ he had been with?   
Some time, he must have fallen asleep over those thoughts.

A podium to end the season was more than Max had been dreaming of.   
Crossing the finish line, fireworks exploding around him, colours everywhere he looked, the cars looked better than ever under the floodlights.   
He savoured all of it, breathed in the scent in the pit lane, the smell of burned tires and motor oil, enjoyed the victory ceremony with every heartbeat.   
He hugged his family tightly and held onto his trophy, clapped the backs of his mechanics and watched the fireworks with his guys for the last time this year, heard an anthem on a podium for the last time of the season.  
There was a team party on a rooftop from where they had an amazing view over the start-finish line and the rest of the circuit, music blasting from the speakers. Despite the official “no-alcohol” rules, people were already way too drunk to care about possible hangovers, everyone being relieved and looking forward to days off.   
  
The night sky and the spotlights illuminating the track made everything look more alive, more special and when Max spotted Daniel standing by the railing, he realized that it made everything so so much prettier as well.   
Tipsy and heated up, he stumbled out and towards Daniel who turned around just in time to prevent the younger one from falling forwards by grabbing his arms and holding him upright.   
Max found himself pressed against the Australian’s front, looking up at him with wide eyes.   
And God, Daniel was so beautiful at that moment, his eyes dark and mysterious, curls framing his face while he was looking down at Max in a mixture of surprise and amusement, along with something else the Dutchman wasn’t able to interpret.   
He felt drawn towards the older one, wanted to be fully wrapped in his arms and breathe in his scent, feel the warmth he had felt back at the party, when Dan had pulled him in for the dance. Dan’s body against his felt promising and good in a way that knocked all oxygen out of Max’s lungs, leaving him both speech- and breathless with Dan’s strong hands wrapped around his arms.   
And they were so close that Max wouldn’t even have to change their positions, leaning in just a few millimetres would be enough to feel the older one’s lips on his own.   
And he had to, he needed to, every fibre of his body yearned for this kiss.   
He could feel how Dan exhaled shakily, his warm breath ghosting over Max’s lips, witnessed how Dan’s eyes widened while they were both frozen in their places.   
And Max remembered what someone had once told them, that the moment before a kiss should feel as good as, if not better than the kiss itself. Full of anticipation, the air crackling in temptation, time coming to stand still for the moment of lips almost but not entirely meeting. So promising and lacking at the very same time.   
And Max’s heart was beating so fast beneath his ribs that he felt like passing out any time, collapsing right into Daniel’s arms.   
And then, the Australian’s dark eyes widened some more and he stumbled back, still staring at Max with shock and confusion in his eyes.   
Max caught his breath and held the older one’s gaze, feeling as if someone had punched him right into his guts.   
The Dutchman turned on his heels and fled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts?


	9. Chapter 9

Max was only waiting for Dan to message him – or the stranger – about the incident but to his surprise, the Aussie didn’t.   
Usually, they talked about everything special that happened and a teammate almost kissing you certainly _was_ special, wasn’t it?  
And Dan _had_ noticed that Max had been about to kiss him, hadn’t he?

When he saw the older one the next day, at the airport before heading into two different directions, taking different flights, it was more than just awkward.   
Dan caught Max’s lingering gaze and frowned at the Dutchman, as if he was trying to read something in him he could not decipher.   
When Max raised his hand to greet him from across the airfield, Dan mirrored the motion hesitantly but without his usual smiles.   
It banged the Red Bull driver up.

Apparently, Dan had overcome it relatively quickly, though, as they had been back to normal on their day at the factory, signing stuff for their crews and filming the yearly On The Sofa.

By now, they were back on a regular chat schedule.   
Dan kept up the inside jokes about the Victoria’s Secret model and Max kept on feeding him true lies, veiling reality in order to not make the older driver suspicious.   
Eventually, Dan sent a flyer.

**What’s that?**

_A Christmas Party_

**A Christmas Party?!**

Max got the feeling that this wouldn’t end well.

_A Christmas Party, yes. A party we will attend. _

**We…**

_Yes, we, as in you and me  
Obviously_

**Obviously… **

_I want us to go there. I want to finally meet there. _

**Because a party worked out so well the last time… **

_Did you read the flyer? It’s a costume party_

Oh God, Max thought.   
Dan had really thought this through.

_We’re going. You can’t argue with me about that. _

**Are you even in Monaco?? **

_Yep, I’ll be home for Christmaaaaas _

**Actually? **

_Nah, probably not. I’ll be in ‘staya with the fam. But no real plans yet. _

Max wanted to say no. He really wanted to. There wasn’t a single sane reason why he should agree to meet up with Dan incognito another time, but then he imagined Dan smiling down at the screen of his phone, imagined him grinning widely if Max would say yes.   
He'd come up with something and if that something had to be the whole truth, so be it.

Max did not come up with anything and if he was being honest with himself, telling Dan the truth had never been a real option. Because Max liked his body parts the way they were, thank you very much.   
December the 15th came closer and closer and the young Dutchman did not have the slightest clue how he was supposed to manoeuvre himself out of this mess without blowing everything up.   
Fucking fuckwits.   
He would message Dan and tell him he wouldn’t make it. He surely would come up with a plausible excuse this time.   
Like that both of his legs were broken or that he was in a coma and not to wake up before next year. Yeah. That coma thing would surely work.   
(Only then Dan would probably show up at his hypothetical hospital bed and identify hypothetical Max as Formula 1 driver Max, so that option was out, too).   
What a crap.

Max sat down on the edge of his bed, burying his face in his hands in helplessness and desperation, when something on his cupboard caught his eye.   
He frowned and got up slowly.   
Could it be the solution to his problem?  
Agitated, Max took the two hazels that were left into his palms and eyed them longingly. The last time, they had provided the key, hadn’t they?   
He clutched the hazelnuts close to his heart and closed his eyes. Jittery, he counted to three and threw one of the nuts over his shoulders.   
Breathing deeply, Max turned around slowly and gasped when resting on his bed, he found what looked like a Santa Clause costume, along with a bushy fake beard, thick glasses and a red Santa hat.   
A costume party indeed.

His fingers were twitching when he dressed up, adjusting the beard which was a bit scratchy but on the good side hid away most of his face.   
The disguise was as perfect as it could get when he put on the thick and a little blear glasses.   
In awe of the hazels, he held onto the last nut tightly before placing it back on the cupboard, this time making sure that he would not accidentally knock it over when opening the door.

Max admired himself in the mirror.  
The costume itself was stuffed with cotton and foam, turning him into a chubby and unrecognizable Santa-version of himself.  
He wasn’t so sure if Dan would see through the charade, anyway, but it was worth the risk. He just wasn’t supposed to speak much, as his voice was probably the most serious risk factor.   
He would do this. He would be able to do this. Some things were simply worth the risk.

When Max was on his way to the party, he gaped in wonder.   
There hadn’t been any snow in Monaco since he had moved here and he knew that it was rather rare in these parallels.   
And still, tiny snowflakes were falling from the sky, covering the streets of Monte Carlo in a beautiful layer of sparkling powder.   
The party was located by the harbour, with a beautiful view over the stormy sea.   
It was partly outdoor, a huge Christmas tree and fairy lights guiding the way.   
The sun had already set and the colourful lights illuminated the fresh snow beautifully, the crackling sound of a fire actually making it feel like Christmas.   
The scent of mulled wine, gingerbread and waffles was hanging in the air and Max found himself missing Christmas time at home, back in the Netherlands with his family.   
Captivated by a certain amount of childhood nostalgia, he entered the area.   
He wasn’t the only Santa, of course, and Dan had not texted him as what he would be dressing up, so Max craned his neck for a familiar face in the crowd.

Just when the Dutchman wanted to get out is phone – the one with the extra sim card, his real phone he had left behind at his apartment – he spotted a familiar mob of black curls in front of him.   
Daniel was wearing a Christmas elf costume in red and green and had turned his back on him.   
A little flustered, Max stepped forward and patted the older one’s shoulder.   
Daniel spun around in surprise and eyed him curiously.   
Max held his breath, afraid that Dan would recognize him underneath the Santa costume, but then the Aussie’s face turned into a relaxed grin and Max’s insides warmed up.   
“Is it you?” Dan asked almost sheepishly and the younger one nodded in confirmation.   
Without a warning, the older driver pulled him into a tight hug and Max found himself holding his breath once again.   
With Daniel’s arms around his frame, he found himself relaxing slowly and eventually wrapped his own around Dan’s back, fingers brushing over the naked skin of his teammate’s neck.   
His heart fluttered in his chest.   
He closed his eyes and inhaled the older one’s scent, savouring it for when they would part again.   
It was Max who eventually stepped back and pointed at a food stand.   
“Hungry?”   
Dan nodded and licked his lips and Max chuckled lowly.   
He was a bit irritated by the smile Daniel sent into his direction, though.   
Max elbowed their way towards the counter, where he ordered hot chocolate and cherry waffles for himself, before turning towards the older one, the beard muffling his voice.   
“And you? I’m paying.”   
Dan beamed, “I’ll take a cup of mulled wine and some ginger bread.”   
Max passed on the order and while waiting for their stuff to be made, they stood next to each other silently, while the Dutchman could feel his teammate’s gaze on him.   
“How do you feel? How was your day?” Dan asked and took his items, “I’m a bit excited you’re here.”   
His cheeks were flushing in a deep red colour and Max couldn’t stop staring at it. At Dan.   
“And once again a costume that doesn’t reveal anything,” Dan frowned, an amused smile still lingering on his lips, “I’m beginning to think that-…”  
He cut himself off and shook his head, “Forget about that.”   
_Thin ice_, Max thought and quickly took his own food and drink, making their way to an umbrella heater.   
Somewhere in the background, “Last Christmas” was playing.   
“I’m great,” he smiled at Daniel, wondering if Dan was even able to see that smile beneath all of the beard, “I’m happy I’m here.”   
“I’m happy, too,” Daniel admitted and there it was again, that faint blush up high on his cheeks. It did funny things to Max’s stomach.   
They weren’t the only ones seeking the warmth of the electric heater, which was the reason why their shoulders were brushing against one another.   
And even through the thick fabric of his costume, Max could feel Daniel’s body heat radiating through him.   
It was a comfortable silence that spread between the two of them and he caught Dan a few times opening his mouth and then closing it again, as if he wanted to say something but didn’t manage to in the end.   
“What is it?” Max eventually asked and Dan looked flustered.   
“I…” the older one started and Max was still amazed by the older one’s discomposure, as it was something he normally wasn’t used to with Dan.   
“I was wondering if you’d grant me another dance?” Dan’s voice was low and raspy, his cheeks now additionally reddened by the mulled wine, the fairy lights’ reflections sparkling in his dark eyes.   
How would Max have been able to say no to him?   
“Of course,” his voice was barely more than a whisper and Daniel beamed, extending a hand to guide them to the dance floor.   
Max took Daniel’s arm and they ended up standing in front of each other with Daniel’s fingertips touching the Dutchman’s wrists.   
The younger one shivered and was sure that Dan noticed.   
He felt his neck growing hot.   
Max had never been a lover of Christmas songs, but with Dan’s fingers interlocked with his, fingertips still ghosting over the sensitive skin of his wrists, it was the best thing he could imagine.   
“All I want for Christmas” suddenly did not sound so cringy anymore and “Last Christmas”, along with the way the Australian sang along to it under his breath, would probably become his new favourite thing now.   
When Daniel accidentally bumped into him, still not letting go of his hands, while spinning around to Britney Spears’ “Santa, can you hear me?”, the two of them burst out in laughter, Dan leaning against his chest.   
“Will you take off your costume later?” Daniel asked, lips almost touching Max’s ear. The ambiguity of the Aussie’s request was hanging in the air unspoken and made the younger one shiver once again.   
He felt himself nodding without being able to do much about it. Dan brought some distance between them with a pleased smile playing on his lips.   
Max let himself be spun around by the other man, dizzy from the movement and dizzy from Dan’s smiles.   
He was aware of the thoughts he had now implanted into Max’s head, wasn’t he?   
Heat was running through the young driver’s body and his skin was tingling where Dan touched him.   
“Will you take off yours?” he heard himself ask lowly and wanted to take back the words immediately, biting down on his tongue so hard that it drew blood.   
What the HELL was he thinking?   
He was staring at Dan, at the way his eyes reflected the Christmas lights, how snowflakes were tangled up in his dark curls.   
With Dan so close, he noticed that there was also a frozen flake caught up in the older one’s long eyelashes and Max couldn’t stop himself from reaching out, cold knuckles brushing against Daniel’s cheekbones.   
This time, it was Dan who shivered, nodding simultaneously.   
Carefully, Max removed the snowflake and watched how it melted on his fingertips immediately.   
They were closer now than before, just a few inches apart, while Dan still hadn’t answered his question. And Max’s gaze wandered over the older one’s face quickly, taking in everything as if it was the last time he would ever see the Aussie like this, so incredibly beautiful under the fairy light’s magic.

_Everybody waits for Christmas  
For me it's new year's day  
That's gonna come and take my blues away  
I'm wishing on the stars for Christmas  
And hoping for a better day  
When it doesn't hurt to feel this way_

The melody of “Hurt’s” melancholic Christmas song lulled Max in and he felt how his breath quickened, the song getting right down to his bones.

_And everywhere there's joy around this festive time of year  
And happiness has never felt so far away_

And Max _felt_ the lyrics because Dan was so incredibly close that he would only have to reach out to claim him as his and yet happiness was so far away, because Max was an idiot and a coward on top, and Dan would never, _never_, be his.

_All of the bells ringing out for Christmas  
I'm singing goodbye to the year before  
I know that the next one will be different  
So much more  
All of the bells ringing out for Christmas  
And I'm not supposed to feel this way  
But all that I want this year for Christmas  
Is New Year's Day_

Next year _would_ be different and things would never be the same again, Dan would be far away, but right now, at this very moment, Daniel was as close as he could be, so close to Max’s thrumming heart.   
And Dan was coming closer and closer, until their noses were suddenly touching, the feeling spinning right down to Max’s core.  
He wanted Dan to do this, wanted the Australian to kiss him right now, wanted to kiss him back with everything he had.   
“I’ll miss you so much when you’ll retire,” he said and his heart stopped beating when he realized what he had just said, confusion washing over Daniel’s face.   
Irritated, Daniel frowned at him and it was only a matter of seconds until Dan would realize, wouldn’t he?  
So Max pushed him away, the shock in Dan’s eyes making his heart clinch, but Max had to get away, for the second time, he fled from the situation and didn’t look back, pushing past the other people, the song still ringing in his ears when he started running.   
The wind was blowing snowflakes in his faze, freezing his limps, but Max couldn’t feel any of it, fire running through his veins while tears started blurring his vision.   
He noticed how his phone slipped out of his pocket and fell to the floor but when he turned around to pick it up, he saw Daniel chasing after him, which was why he didn’t hesitate and kept on running, leaving the phone behind.

_All of the bells ringing out for Christmas  
I'm singing goodbye to the year before  
I know that the next one will be different  
So much more_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two more chapters to come...  
please leave kudos if you liked this! <3


	10. Chapter 10

Max felt paralyzed when he arrived at his apartment and felt paralyzed still for the following days.   
The more time passed, the worse he felt, a big lump of ‘what if’s forming in his stomach, which ate him up simultaneously.   
Originally, he had planned on spending some time with his friends in Austria, going skiing to get his mind off the season, but Max cancelled all plans and instead hid away in his apartment.   
Why had he said that?   
It must have been the final thing to make the penny drop for Dan. If he hadn’t been suspicious before, he definitely was now.   
Who wouldn’t be?

A few days later, Max had come to a new realisation.   
Apparently, Dan had not made the connection between driver-Max and chat-Max.   
Because if he had, he would have confronted him about it by now.   
And Max didn’t know which was worse; Dan, making the connection but finally having the truth out in the open, or Dan having no clue whatsoever.   
As he had lost his phone, he couldn’t even text Dan without blowing the cover.   
The Australian would never believe him if he’d claim that he had memorized his phone number by heart, because who did that nowadays?   
Was Dan trying to contact chat-Max?  
Was he trying to track him down without a starting point?   
The phone wouldn’t help him much, as Max only used it for texting Daniel and it was locked with a code, anyway.

Max lost his sleep due to all the overthinking but nothing came out of it, though. The only possible solution was to tell Dan the truth and Max wasn’t ready for that. Doubted that he’d ever be.   
Because not only would it mean that he’d have to tell the Aussie that he had been lying to him all the time – oh no.   
He would also be confronted with the question of his own feelings and Max had never been one to talk about his emotions.   
Hidden beneath costumes it had been easy.   
But eye to eye with his older teammate, with nothing between them that could shield Max from rejection, he wouldn’t be able to make himself do that.   
And what was he supposed to tell Dan, anyway?  
What _did_ he feel for the Australian?   
All these secrets and the texting had kept him busy, distracting him from what had been lying under it all the time. Now that these things had broken off, everything that had been hidden beneath the surface seemed to reappear.

He was so done with 2018.   
He wished Christmas time was already over and he missed driving his car, he missed that adrenaline rush that did not leave room for any other thoughts. That would have been exactly what he’d need right now and Max craved to go back to racing.   
Racing was what he was good at.   
This…. Certainly wasn’t.  
But the first race of the new season was months away, even testing was still far ahead. Instead, the festive season was in full swing and the driver’s Christmas staff party was separating him from holidays with his family.   
Over the last years, it had become a tradition that the majority of the drivers and some team chefs would meet up in Monaco for small celebrations and as it would be Fernando’s last Christmas party with them, the event had been ranked as top priority by the guys.   
Max really did not feel like going and would have found some way around it but he _did_ have lots of respect for Nando and wasn’t too keen on missing this goodbye celebrations either.   
He wasn’t too sure if Dan would show up, as they hadn’t spoken since the days at the factory, but there was no reason why he shouldn’t attend and that didn’t exactly lighten the mood for Max.  
  
For some reason, the Dutchman had been carrying the only left hazel with him since the latest incidence, as it spent a weird kind of conform, and as he left for the Driver Party, he did not make an exception to that habit.   
Lewis, who had been in charge of the organizing, had rented a location that wasn’t too far from all of their apartments and Max could walk there.  
His mood was pretty much miserable when he arrived, which – of course – did not escape Carlos’ notice.   
The Spaniard was waiting by the entrance and pulled Max into a tight hug immediately, a wide grin plastered on his face.   
“Why are you so cheery?” Max asked in a sour mood and his best friend grabbed his shoulders, examining him closely.   
“I’m _sorry_, Mr Grumpy.”  
He rolled his eyes and dragged Max along, right into a crowd of drivers and other persons from the F1 circus.   
“So, tell me, what’s bugging you?” Carlos asked and forced the younger one to sit down at one end of the long dining table that was in the centre of the room.   
“Nothing,” he mumbled through gritted teeth and tried to scan the room without raising his friend’s suspicion. Daniel wasn’t to spot anywhere, though.   
Carlos sat down next to him and Max avoided his curious gaze.   
“Cut the bullshit. What happened? You didn’t reply to any of my texts!”   
Max sighed and started playing with some of the decorations.   
“Max…” Carlos insisted and nudged his shoulder.   
“I know there’s something up with you!” he added and made some room for Lewis, who sat down on the other side of the Dutchman.   
Max just wanted to hide his face away in his palms and drown everything out.   
“Did you have a fight with Dan or something?” Lewis asked and Max’s gaze snapped up.   
“What?” he stared at the Brit, “why’d you think that?”  
The Mercedes driver shrugged his shoulders and glanced around the room, as if searching for someone.   
“I don’t know, you’re in a bad mood, Dan is acting weird… It’s-…”   
“Dan is acting weird?” Max repeated and cut the older driver off, “how is he acting weird?”   
“He’s just acting weird,” Lewis stated and took a gulp from his glass of wine, “have you guys seen Nico?”   
“Nico?” Carlos asked, “Hulk?”   
Lewis rolled his eyes and shook his head.   
“I haven’t,” the Spaniard answered and hit Max’s arm when the younger one didn’t respond.   
“What? Eh, no, I haven’t.”   
Lewis sighed and got up again.   
  
“So,” Carlos asked, once Lewis had left them alone, “did you have a fight with Daniel?”   
Max turned towards his friend in annoyance, “Why would I fight with Dan?”   
“Yeah… let me think… maybe because you nearly kissed your very own teammate in Abu Dhabi?”   
“What?” Max hissed and his eyes widened, “who told you that?”   
Carlos let out a laugh, “You did, don’t you remember?”   
Max groaned, “I was dunk.”   
“Yes,” Carlos said, “I remember that much.”   
His eyes wandered over Max’s face.   
“I thought you’d talk to me about it once you’d be sober.”   
“I really don’t wanna talk about it, sorry.”   
“I think you should talk about it.”   
“I don’t care what you think I should do, Chili.”   
Carlos hit his shoulder once again.   
“Ouch!”   
“You’re an idiot, Max, you know that?”   
Max turned to face the older one again, feeling anger and something close to helplessness boil in his stomach, “I just can’t talk about it!”  
“You can’t or you don’t want to?”   
“This is something between Dan and me,” Max groaned and Carlos’ dark eyes lit up, a smirk forming on his lips.   
“So something _did_ happen between you two, apart from you nearly kissing him!”  
Max sighed.   
Carlos wouldn’t understand and he wouldn’t bother to explain.   
“Please, Chili. Not now, okay? I just want to get over with this.”   
Carlos kept his mouth shut at that but still eyed him closely, Max starting to feel uncomfortable under his best friend’s intense gaze.   
Therefore, he was more than just glad when the table eventually started to fill with the other drivers.   
He listened to Seb and Kimi who told the story of how exactly Kimi had managed to get that drunk in Russia and Stoffel talked about his first race in a Formula E car and for a bit, Max had a genuinely good time.

It was when they were waiting for dinner to be served, that the door opened up and revealed Daniel.   
Max had almost hoped that he wouldn’t show up anymore and yet he couldn’t help the little flip his tummy did at the sight of the Australian, in his cosy jumper, hair a little longer and not as neatly cut as usual.   
He looked fluffy.   
The only thing that did not match that impression was the expression on his face.   
Dan looked like a man on a mission, like he usually looked during Qualifying runs, eyes focused and face a little tense.   
Max wasn’t the only one who watched the Aussie come closer in surprise but Max sure was the only one who held his breath while doing so.

The now former Red Bull driver stood still at one end of the table, using a glass and a little spoon to get the attention of those who hadn’t noticed him yet.   
“I’d like to say something,” Dan said in a voice loud enough to not be overheard by anyone.   
Max felt how his heart picked up speed.   
The Aussie cleared his voice.   
“Most of you won’t know what I’ll be talking about but I think one person in this room can and that’s why I’m here.”   
He paused and looked around the table.   
“I’m not stupid, you know.”   
Oh God, Max thought. Oh fucking God.   
“I suspected something was off after you didn’t want to reveal your identity to me at the Halloween party. And I _knew_ something wasn’t right when the same happened again.”   
Was Dan’s voice actually shaking a little?   
“I wasn’t able to make out what exactly was wrong and I thought it had to do something with me, with my identity.”   
Oh fucking hell.   
“But then you said ‘I’ll miss you so much once you’ll retire’ and something clicked. It wasn’t about my identity. Not at all. It was about yours all along.”   
Max couldn’t say for sure if it was anger in Dan’s undertone or something else, but it made him feel sick.   
“You were the one who hadn’t been telling the truth all along. You never messaged me accidentally, did you? You knew who I was and you made use of that.”  
Dan’s eyes were meeting Max’s for a quarter of a moment but he seemed to observe everyone else too.   
“And I asked myself: why wouldn’t they reveal their identity? The only logical explanation is that you’re close to me, in some way. So I narrowed it down to this room of people.”   
Max watched how the rest of the driver shot each other confused glances. Kimi smirked amusedly and mumbled something to Seb. Seb told him to shut up.   
Max’s heart was beating in his throat by now and he wondered if his face was as red as it felt.   
Dan was pissed. Really pissed. And he had every right to be, because Max had fucked up.   
“I…” Dan started again but closed his mouth again. He took a deep breath.   
“And despite everything, I still feel like… I still mean what I said when I told you that I had felt like we were supposed to meet. I still think…” his voice broke off and Max’s gaze snapped up, “I still think that we’re… I…”  
Daniel looked down at the glass in his hand.   
“I just can’t stop thinking about you at all.”   
The Australian let out a shaky breath and Max felt heat rushing through his body.   
He closed his eyes.   
Dan didn’t mean what he was implying. Once he’d find out that it had been Max all along, he wouldn’t want him anymore.   
He wasn’t what Dan needed.   
Daniel had no idea what he was saying.

“So… does anyone have something to say about that?” the Australian asked and had a look around the room.   
“I guessed that much.”  
“I thought that you probably wouldn’t reveal your identity to me voluntarily but guess what? You didn’t give me a choice either when you simply didn’t tell me that I actually knew you when you pretended we were strangers.”  
Dan’s voice was shaking again.   
Dan then fetched something from his pocket and Max couldn’t identify the black object at first, but when he eventually did, his breath got caught in his throat.  
“But you lost something during your Cinderella escape.”   
In his hand, Dan held the phone containing Max’s extra sim card, which he had indeed lost while fleeing from the Christmas party.   
“And the one person in this room who can unlock this phone is the person that I think I’ve… I’ve fallen in love with.”   
Dan had lowered his gaze, cheeks burning in shame and Max gasped, staring at the older man in awe.   
Daniel had… Daniel had fallen in love with him?   
_No. He hasn’t. He has developed a crush on an anonymous stranger. Not on you._  
Max bit down on his lip and something in his chest clinched.   
Dan would hate him once he’d know the truth. Dan was still caught up in some illusion and once Max would reveal the truth, he’d shatter whatever the Aussie was making himself believe.   
Reality could never be like the images his former teammate had projected in his head.   
So he’d just pretend not to know the code to unlock the phone.   
Better keep Daniel guessing and pining for someone that didn’t actually exist than have him hate Max for who he was and who he wasn’t.   
“That person could just say they don’t know the code. In case you’re right about them not wanting to reveal themselves to you,” Lewis added for consideration and Max cursed the Brit in his head.   
“Yes,” Daniel said and a small smile started playing on his lips, “but the phone is secured with a fingerprint.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oooooh.....   
we're getting there!
> 
> Let me just say, I've been absolutely overwhelmed by your response to this little fic!  
After the support I got for "Latesummer in Amsterdam" and "Remember When", I never would have thought to experience something like that again and your comments for this fic have even surpassed that!!!
> 
> Thank you so much and merry christmas to all of you!  
I cannot wait to share the novel-length Maxiel fic I've written as a christmas present to my friend Anni with you next season <3


	11. Chapter 11

Oh God.  
Max nearly choked and then tried to cover it up with a cough.  
He had thought to keep out of harm’s way by installing the fingerprint lock and by doing that, he had now given Dan all opportunities to uncover him.  
“That’s smart,” Kimi said and Max saw the other guys nodding.  
So it was over. Truly and entirely over. There wasn’t anything he could do.

“Lewis?” Dan asked, as the Brit was the one sitting the closest to him.  
The Mercedes driver extended his hand with a grin but, as expected, he did not manage to unlock the phone.  
Neither did Kevin, Fernando or Nico Rosberg.  
Dan went around the table and continued with Lance and Marcus. He then skipped Sebastian and Kimi for obvious reasons, which made the German blush from head to toe and earned them a few chuckles from the rest of the drivers.  
Max, for his part, had never felt farer from amusement, instead the heat running through his veins was now turning into freezing ice, making his limps feel lump and his brain unable to come up with any kind of idea.  
He watched frozen how Dan took Charles hand in his and guided his finger to the screen, then Pierre’s and Romains and fucking hell, Carlos was now the only one separating him from Daniel and then everyone would know, _Dan_ would know.  
A solution.  
He needed a solution. And a quick one on top.  
The hazel!  
Hadn’t the nuts always provided one before?  
He palmed the hazel through the fabric of his jeans. It was certainly worth a try, wasn’t it?  
“I’ll be back in a minute,” Max informed Carlos in a low voice but loud enough to let some others hear, pointing at the toilets.  
Carlos nodded absently, already busy pressing his finger on the home button on his phone.  
Max forced himself to look as unbothered as possible while he was crossing the few meters towards the toilet, locking the door behind him once he was there.  
He leaned his back against it and took a deep breath.  
“You’re my last shot,” Max mumbled after getting out the final hazel, closing his fist around it before he threw it over his shoulder, holding his breath.  
But when he turned around, expecting to find something – anything – he was disappointed. He took a close look around the room, but there wasn’t anything to find.  
No costume. Nothing that would get him out of this.  
_Nothing. No costume. _  
So did the hazels want him to… just be himself? Was that the message?

The amount of adrenaline that was flooding his veins when Max opened the door of the toilet was unlike anything he had experienced before and he felt lightheaded from breathing way too fast.  
Fear was coming over him, now that everyone in the room was staring at him when he entered and with shaking hands, he realized that Dan had probably let everyone try already – which only left him.  
Max felt like turning around and running away, as he had done so often lately, but something in him forced him to keep walking, further and further, until he was eventually standing right in front of Daniel.  
The Australian looked at him with doubt in his eyes, hands falling down at his sides.  
Max couldn’t read in the older man’s face, could not make anything of the emotions that seemed to flicker over the other driver’s face.  
And Max’s gaze dropped to the phone in Daniel’s face, breathing heavily.  
“Max…” Daniel whispered and the younger one looked up again, almost drowning in Dan’s dark eyes.  
Doubt was still written all over the older one’s face when he slowly lifted the phone and held it in place for Max to place his finger on.  
The Dutchman’s hand was trembling when he slowly took the phone out of Daniel’s hand, shooting the Aussie a last glance.  
“What are you doing?” Dan asked, and he sounded like he was out of breath, too, his voice barely more than a whisper.  
Max’s heartbeat was now so strong that it seemed to fill his whole body.  
Daniel jumped when his own phone vibrated in his back pocket.  
Max looked up again and could see how Daniel held his breath, reaching for his phone, fingers trembling just as hard as the Dutch’s own.  
With parted lips, Max watched Daniel getting out his phone and unlocking it, right up to that moment when Daniel’s eyes shot up.

**I think I’m in love with you, too**

“You…” Dan breathed, the grip around his phone so hard that his knuckles turned white.  
“Me…” Max repeated and then they stared at each other for what felt like an eternity, a few feet apart, gazes interlocked.  
Max wanted to ask Dan to say something, anything, and then he nearly fell over when Dan suddenly stepped forward, cupping his jaw with both of his hands.  
Max shivered under the touch, while their eyes were still meeting, only that Dan was so close now, _so so close_, their chests touching and bodies aligned.  
And Max leaned into the touch of Daniel’s hands, breathing flatly, not daring to make a move.  
Dan’s eyes were so full of emotions that it knocked all remaining oxygen straight out of Max’s lungs, only causing him to breathe even faster.  
“Shh,” Dan made, his thumb brushing over the younger one’s cheekbones, who was staring at the Australian wide-eyed.  
“I should have known it is you. Always you,” Daniel whispered and then he closed his eyes and Max thought _Oh my God_, and the next second, Max wasn’t able to think at all, because he felt Dan’s soft lips against his and Daniel kissed him, kissed him in a way that made Max feel like he had never been kissed before.  
He leaned into the kiss and felt one of Dan’s hands leave his face and sneake into his neck, pulling him closer, while Max was overwhelmed by all of it, by Daniel’s lips on his, by the warmth of his hands, by the gentleness in his motions.  
“I’m sorry, fuck, Dan, I’m so so sorry,” Max mumbled into the kiss and Dan’s hand curled around his hip, holding him close.  
“Shut up, Max.”  
Dan leaned his forehead against Max’s, both of them gasping for air.  
“I’m so sorry,” the Dutchman repeated and now it was him cupping Daniel’s jaw, brushing over the soft stubble on his chin, because apparently he was allowed to touch Dan, after all these weeks, after all these _months_.  
“_Shut up_,” Daniel mumbled and kissed him again, quicker this time, but oh so promising.  
“I’ve always known you’re an idiot. That’s nothing new.”  
“Well, I’ve never known you were a Victoria’s Secret model, so…”  
Max blushed and Daniel chuckled softly, before he pulled Max into a tight hug, his lips brushing over the Dutchman’s ear.  
“I’m not going to retire, Maxy. I’ll be right down the pit lane. Just a few kisses away.”  
And Max, for the first time since hearing the news, felt like he could live with that.

_  
The end. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is it.  
the very final chapter.  
thank you so much for reading this and for all the amazing support I've received along the way. 
> 
> Like I've said before, I cannot wait to share my new Maxiel fanfic "Bottled Up" with you next season!
> 
> In case you're interested (idk in what, haha) here's my twitter: @wecouldbesea and @borninstorms is my instagram.  
Thanks alot!
> 
> (And in case you haven't left kudos yet.... ;) )

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is it!  
Let me know what you think so far! :)


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